Sunday 27 February 2011
Wednesday 23 February 2011
Things I'm loving right now: Mom edition
Posted on 09:32 by Unknown
I can't say enough good things about our Boppy pillow and slipcover. We use this thing all the time, every day, and we have since day 1 in the hospital. Whether you're breastfeeding or formula feeding, it's a convenient way to hold baby without wearing your arms out or bothering your sensitive postpartum tummy. There are tons of cute slipcovers to choose from, too, and they unzip and come off easily for washing.
A First Years Bottle Warmer was handed down to us from someone who has a little boy about 8 months older than Colin. This thing is great. You just fill the little vials with the right amount of water, dump the water in the reservoir, stick the bottle in there and push the start button. Within about 2 minutes, the bottle is warm and ready to go. The back compartment is for keeping bottles cool, like a tiny refrigerator, to make night feedings easier.
Colin loves his Nuk pacifiers! Not sure how much there is to say about these- they're pretty self explanatory. He isn't a paci addict, and he'll spit them out sometimes, but when he's fussy and just needs to suck on something, these do the trick and keep Mommy and Daddy happy, too. :)
We. love. Mylicon. Seriously, this stuff is like baby crack. When Colin has gas bubbles and gets fussy, this stuff calms him down immediately. It smells like strawberries and has a sweet taste, and he loves loves loves it. I really don't know what we would do without it.
Every night when it's time for bed, we wrap our little guy up in his Halo SleepSack Swaddle. It's warm and fleecy, and I love it because it has velcro for easy swaddling. When we first started using this, we had to put him in it when he was already asleep, or he would fight it. But he has started to accept it as part of his bedtime routine, and he seems to like it now. Heck.. I wish they made these things in my size. They're so cozy!
When we were expecting, my mother in law got us a Snuza Halo after seeing doctors praise it on a TV show. It's a little breathing monitor designed to prevent SIDS and give parents peace of mind while their little one sleeps. It clips onto baby's diaper, and the little purple part rests on baby's tummy. If it recognizes that movement has stopped, it vibrates to stimulate baby and get him to move. If 5 seconds of vibration doesn't work, the Snuza sets off a loud alarm to alert Mom and Dad to go check on baby. It really is a cool little thing, and I sleep better when I know he has it on. I've only had one false alarm, and it was while I was holding Colin during a night feeding. He was wiggling around, and the Snuza had worked its way off of his diaper. We haven't had any scares while he's swaddled and in bed, though. I would recommend the Snuza to any new parent. Better safe than sorry!
*Diapers are cheaper if you order them online. Diapers.com or Amazon are great resources.
*Our favorite wipes are the cheapy Target brand.
*If formula feeding, it is so important to have a couple bottles pre-mixed and ready to go in the fridge. This makes for a much happier mom and baby during night feedings.
*Sometimes it's fun not to worry about entertaining yourself when you get up with baby. It's nice just to spend some time together, look at each other and enjoy the precious time. My sweet boy won't be this little for long, so I am trying my best to savor every moment with him!
More to come.
Saturday 19 February 2011
On breastfeeding
Posted on 18:11 by Unknown
I just finished what will probably be my last session with the breast pump, ever. (Or, at least until baby #2). And you know what? It's not the end of the world. At least that's what I keep telling myself!
For some reason, I always thought breastfeeding would be easy. I mean, if you've never done it before, it seems logical. Insert boob in baby's mouth, baby eats efficiently and happily. It's free, and great for mom and baby. End of story. Right? Wrong, at least in my case. Because of the trauma surrounding Colin's birth (emergency c-section and all), my milk didn't come in right away, which was stressful for the both of us, and nursing was painful for me from day 1. He also had an awkward latch with his tiny mouth, and we ended up having to use a nipple shield, which seemed to work pretty well for a while. But, he was also a leisurely diner, and would often take up to an hour per nursing session. It felt like nursing was all I did. So, I decided to start pumping.
Pumping seemed like the best solution. It couldn't be that hard, right? Insert boob into flange, turn on pump, sit there and let the thing catch glorious amounts of precious breast milk for baby to drink out of a bottle. Ugh.. wrong again. No matter how often I pumped, how much water I drank, how many calories I made an effort to consume.. I always pumped about 1 oz per breast each session. I began to feel like the pump was attached to me with a ball and chain. It consumed copious amounts of my time, and for what.. 2 oz of breast milk every 3 hours? Because Colin is such a good eater, it was taking 2 pumping sessions to make enough milk for one feeding, so he was already getting more formula than breast milk anyway, to be sure he was getting enough calories and gaining the right amount of weight.
Last night, as I was pumping, it occurred to me that Colin and I would both be happier if I quit stressing so much about the whole thing. As much as it frustrated me to do so, I made the decision to skip a pumping session and see if I ended up engorged and full of milk. Skipping one session didn't seem to affect me at all, so I skipped another.. and another.. until I had gone one full day without pumping. Just a little while ago, I hooked myself up to the pump to relieve the slight bit of pressure I was experiencing, and got less than half an ounce, total. And so, with that, I'm pretty sure I'm done.
I will admit.. the thought of giving up on breastfeeding makes me feel just a tiny bit like a failure. Women do it all the time, so why can't I? I know that there are ways to increase your supply, and there are lactation consultants (I've already been to one). But, you know what? For me -- for us -- I think formula is going to be the best route from here on out. A happy mom equals a happy baby, and I believe that this is what we need to do to keep us both happy. I do intend to try again with our next baby, and I take comfort in the fact that my son got a decent amount of breast milk in his first month of life, including the precious colostrum when he was first born. I know I am not a failure, and that many moms formula feed. I am a proud parent who loves my child and wants only the best for him, and who wants to be the best mother I can possibly be.
And now.. here's a healthy dose of cuteness to tide you over!
For some reason, I always thought breastfeeding would be easy. I mean, if you've never done it before, it seems logical. Insert boob in baby's mouth, baby eats efficiently and happily. It's free, and great for mom and baby. End of story. Right? Wrong, at least in my case. Because of the trauma surrounding Colin's birth (emergency c-section and all), my milk didn't come in right away, which was stressful for the both of us, and nursing was painful for me from day 1. He also had an awkward latch with his tiny mouth, and we ended up having to use a nipple shield, which seemed to work pretty well for a while. But, he was also a leisurely diner, and would often take up to an hour per nursing session. It felt like nursing was all I did. So, I decided to start pumping.
Pumping seemed like the best solution. It couldn't be that hard, right? Insert boob into flange, turn on pump, sit there and let the thing catch glorious amounts of precious breast milk for baby to drink out of a bottle. Ugh.. wrong again. No matter how often I pumped, how much water I drank, how many calories I made an effort to consume.. I always pumped about 1 oz per breast each session. I began to feel like the pump was attached to me with a ball and chain. It consumed copious amounts of my time, and for what.. 2 oz of breast milk every 3 hours? Because Colin is such a good eater, it was taking 2 pumping sessions to make enough milk for one feeding, so he was already getting more formula than breast milk anyway, to be sure he was getting enough calories and gaining the right amount of weight.
Last night, as I was pumping, it occurred to me that Colin and I would both be happier if I quit stressing so much about the whole thing. As much as it frustrated me to do so, I made the decision to skip a pumping session and see if I ended up engorged and full of milk. Skipping one session didn't seem to affect me at all, so I skipped another.. and another.. until I had gone one full day without pumping. Just a little while ago, I hooked myself up to the pump to relieve the slight bit of pressure I was experiencing, and got less than half an ounce, total. And so, with that, I'm pretty sure I'm done.
I will admit.. the thought of giving up on breastfeeding makes me feel just a tiny bit like a failure. Women do it all the time, so why can't I? I know that there are ways to increase your supply, and there are lactation consultants (I've already been to one). But, you know what? For me -- for us -- I think formula is going to be the best route from here on out. A happy mom equals a happy baby, and I believe that this is what we need to do to keep us both happy. I do intend to try again with our next baby, and I take comfort in the fact that my son got a decent amount of breast milk in his first month of life, including the precious colostrum when he was first born. I know I am not a failure, and that many moms formula feed. I am a proud parent who loves my child and wants only the best for him, and who wants to be the best mother I can possibly be.
And now.. here's a healthy dose of cuteness to tide you over!
Thursday 10 February 2011
Things I've Learned in Three Weeks of Parenting
Posted on 10:58 by Unknown
1. The old "sleep when the baby sleeps" saying is so. true. If we need a nap, we sleep when Colin goes down. This really works, I'm telling you!
2. When you become a parent, you go into "survival mode" and do things you didn't originally plan on doing. You do what works. For example, if I'm not making enough milk to satisfy my little guy, we'll give him a bottle of formula to tide him over. That's something I hadn't originally planned for.
3. Breastfeeding - and pumping - can be painful and aggravating. Over the past week or so, I have become an exclusive pumper, and my nipples are pretty much always sore and sensitive.
4. When you're a new parent, you never get tired of staring at your little one and studying his features. I swear this kid gets more beautiful every day.
5. Little boys WILL pee on you - it's inevitable.
More to come - Colin is waking up from his nap. :)
Friday 4 February 2011
Colin's Birth Story
Posted on 17:05 by Unknown
My apologies for the crazy delay on this.. we've been pretty busy the last couple weeks. :) I have been dying to get the story of Colin's birth down on paper (er... on the computer) before I forget the details. Since he's asleep on my chest right now, I figure it's a good a time as any! So, here goes...
[Sidenote: I am now going on day 3 of writing this. Finding time to type this out has been harder than I thought it would be!]
[Sidenote: I am now going on day 3 of writing this. Finding time to type this out has been harder than I thought it would be!]
Sunday, January 16th, was like any other day. Justin and I got up, got ourselves around and went to church. We had lunch, spent some time together afterward, and made plans to meet Justin's brother, Tim, and his wife, Shannon, for dinner at Carrabba's later in the afternoon.
Fast forward to dinner. It was great - I got my favorite meal (maybe ever), Chicken Bryan, and ate all of it, Caesar salad and bread included, without shame. Heck, I was 37 and a half weeks pregnant. I figured I had a pass to eat like a pig! Shannon joked that maybe the heavy meal would put me into labor, and we all laughed. I wasn't due for nearly 3 more weeks, and didn't think our little one would be making his entrance anytime in the near future. Little did I know, he had other plans!
In the car on the way home, I started having contractions. It was about 6:30 pm at this point, and I noticed that in the time it took to make it home, the contractions got stronger and closer together. Still, I assumed they were Braxton Hicks and brushed them off. I decided to walk around at home and see what happened with the contractions. With my trusty copy of What to Expect When You're Expecting in hand, I read and walked. I read about the signs of early labor and shared them with Justin. After about 45 minutes of walking, my contractions had gotten even worse and even closer together. They were about five minutes apart at that point. So, we decided to make the call.
I called the number I had been given for my OB's office, but since it was after hours, I was forwarded to an answering service. I was told that the OB on call would call me back shortly.
Since the contractions stayed at 5 minutes apart and weren't letting up, Justin loaded the car with our hospital suitcase, and we decided to start driving to the hospital. I received a call from Dr. Neuffer en route, and she asked me what was going on, and how things had gone at my last appointment, just two days beforehand. I told her that I thought I was in labor, that my contractions had been 5 minutes apart for over an hour, and that at my last prenatal visit I had been dilated to 1 centimeter and 60% effaced. She agreed that I should go to the hospital and check in on the labor and delivery floor.
I think it was around 8 pm when we got into a triage room. A nurse checked me once we were settled in, and said that I had dilated to 2-3 centimeters, and was about 75% effaced. We were excited! I was making progress, and figured we might get to meet our baby that night.
I was hooked up to two monitors: one to watch my contractions, and the other to listen to the baby's heartbeat. The nurse left the room and said she'd be back later to look at the printouts from the monitors, and Justin and I were left to talk, to watch the Golden Globes on the little wall-mounted TV, and to rub my big belly while it lasted.
When the nurse came back, she took the printouts and went to call Dr. Neuffer. She returned shortly after and said that we had a choice: to go home and labor, and come back when things got more intense, or to stay for overnight observation. I figured, if I was already making progress, I didn't want to leave. So we stayed. As unreasonable as it may have seemed, I was afraid to go home. I was afraid that we would get home, my water would break or I would suddenly dilate to 10 and feel pressure and have to rush right back to the hospital. If I could do it all over again, I probably would have just come home and labored. We would have had a better chance at sleep, anyway. The observation room we were moved to in the hospital was small and uncomfortable, and we had to use a shared bathroom. Not my idea of fun, but hey - it's what I thought was best at the time.
Throughout the night, the nurse came in and out and checked my progress every so often. In an attempt to get myself to dilate more, I was allowed to walk the halls for about an hour. Justin came with me, and we walked and talked, stopping every few minutes for the really bad contractions to pass. It seemed to be working! By 6 am, I was a good 3 centimeters dilated, and the nurse decided it was time to admit me to my own L&D room.
I was wheeled to my new room, and Justin brought all our stuff - suitcase, camera, my clothes. We got all settled in, since we assumed we'd be in that room until I delivered.
Wrong again. But we'll get to that a little later.
-January 17, 2011-
With a new day came Nurse Ann, who had just started her shift, and Dr. Kathryn Moore, the next OB on call. Nurse Ann was just awesome. She was so attentive to my every need, and really helped make me feel comfortable while I labored.
I was checked frequently and hooked up to IVs - bags of fluids, antibiotics (because I tested positive for Group B Strep at my last prenatal checkup) and eventually pitocin, once my cervix seemed to stop dilating at 4-5 centimeters. In an attempt to move things along further, Dr. Moore came in and broke my water, which was a very strange feeling. Justin saw the gush from where he was sitting, but bless his heart, he wasn't nearly as grossed out as I expected he would be.
After a couple hours, I was on the maximum allowed dosage of pitocin, and my contractions were 2 minutes apart and getting pretty painful. I finally gave in at this point and asked for an epidural. The anesthesiologist was great, and I was surprised at how much the epi didn't hurt. I was expecting for it to be incredibly uncomfortable, but it really wasn't bad. Justin sat in front of me and observed while Nurse Ann basically hugged me so that I could bend forward into an awkward, hunched over position. I did have two contractions while the anesthesiologist did his thing, so I think that sort of distracted me from any pain that I might have otherwise felt.
Almost immediately after being given the epidural, I started to feel less pain from the contractions, which at this point were still consistently 2 minutes apart. Since I wasn't allowed to get up from my bed once the epidural was administered, I had a catheter inserted, and since she was in there anyway, the doctor decided to insert an internal monitor as well, so she could keep an eye on the intensity of my contractions.
Dr. Moore came in for one more check somewhere around 3 pm, and said that based on the internal monitor, my contractions looked great, but I hadn't made any more progress, and my baby had moved from -1 to -3.. so he was actually going back up the birth canal instead of coming down. Go figure. I was told that it was time to prep for a c-section and move from my labor and delivery room to the OR.
I was absolutely terrified. As soon as the doctor left the room, I broke down into ugly, raw sobs. Justin held me, and we cried together. I told him that I had worked so hard, and said that I wanted so badly to do this on my own; that I didn't want a c-section. I was so tired after 21 hours of labor and no sleep. I suddenly hated the pitocin, hated the contractions that led absolutely nowhere, hated the epidural because had I known I would be having surgery, I would have opted for the spinal instead. The epidural is designed to help with contractions and pushing, I was told. Women with scheduled c-sections get the spinal. This terrified me even more.
Nurse Ann and an anesthesiology nurse prepped me for surgery. My pelvic area was shaved, and a whole new dose of.. something.. was pumped into my back via the epidural. It made me feel incredibly cold, and I started to shiver to the point where my teeth were chattering. A lovely blue hairnet was placed over my disheveled hair. Justin was given a sterile ensemble to put on, too.
Within minutes, I was being wheeled through hallways in my hospital bed. Since I was laying flat on my back, all I saw were ceiling tiles and ugly florescent lights. I tried to focus on the end result, on the beautiful baby that I would soon get to hold in my arms. I knew that soon, this would all be over and I would be a mommy to a perfect little boy.
Justin was told to wait outside the operating room while everything was set up. A big blue sheet was put up, separating my upper and lower halves. The anesthesiology nurse took out my earrings, and I felt a light pressure on my lower abdomen as I was swabbed with something - alcohol or iodine, maybe - and I heard the surgical team talking to each other, as if I weren't even in the room.
I heard Dr. Kathryn say "incision" as she cut into me, and that single word made me incredibly nervous. This was it. No turning back.
Justin was finally allowed into the room after the surgery had begun. He talked me through the surgery and tried to keep me calm, but it was so hard to focus on anything other than what was going on behind the big blue sheet. I felt such incredible pressure, and at one point, I was sure I felt pain. When I said so, the doctor said that she was cutting through a layer that I might feel a little bit of. Great. I'm pretty sure I moaned and grunted through the rest of the surgery, because I felt SO much going on down there. I've heard women talk about their c-sections before, and say that they didn't feel anything, and I kept thinking that this was the most awful thing that had ever happened to me. Maybe it was because of that stupid epidural, or maybe it was all in my head; I don't know. What I do know is that I felt like I was being ripped in half.
I asked if the baby was almost here, and someone said they saw a head...
and then, suddenly, I heard the most beautiful sound in the entire world. I heard my newborn son's cry. And it was amazing. Justin and I instantly started to cry right along with him. The sheet was held down a bit so that we could see him, and the doctor said "we have a boy!" I barely remember seeing my baby for the first time; my eyes were so blurred from tears, and as soon as he was out of me, the anesthesiology nurse pumped something else into my back that made me fall asleep on the table several times.
My boys were both whisked away from me as I was stitched and stapled together. They later came and saw me in recovery, once Colin was all cleaned up and had been checked out.
So, there you have it. Recovery has been a whole different story, but after nearly 3 weeks, I am feeling much, much better. I am so blessed to be a mommy, and to have this amazing little boy in my life. I look at him every day with a sense of awe; I haven't fully wrapped my brain around the fact that he is mine, and that I grew him in my body. I honestly couldn't ask for anything better. And my husband has been fantastic throughout this whole adjustment process. He is such a great daddy, he truly is. And we are a family. :)
Throughout the night, the nurse came in and out and checked my progress every so often. In an attempt to get myself to dilate more, I was allowed to walk the halls for about an hour. Justin came with me, and we walked and talked, stopping every few minutes for the really bad contractions to pass. It seemed to be working! By 6 am, I was a good 3 centimeters dilated, and the nurse decided it was time to admit me to my own L&D room.
I was wheeled to my new room, and Justin brought all our stuff - suitcase, camera, my clothes. We got all settled in, since we assumed we'd be in that room until I delivered.
Wrong again. But we'll get to that a little later.
-January 17, 2011-
With a new day came Nurse Ann, who had just started her shift, and Dr. Kathryn Moore, the next OB on call. Nurse Ann was just awesome. She was so attentive to my every need, and really helped make me feel comfortable while I labored.
I was checked frequently and hooked up to IVs - bags of fluids, antibiotics (because I tested positive for Group B Strep at my last prenatal checkup) and eventually pitocin, once my cervix seemed to stop dilating at 4-5 centimeters. In an attempt to move things along further, Dr. Moore came in and broke my water, which was a very strange feeling. Justin saw the gush from where he was sitting, but bless his heart, he wasn't nearly as grossed out as I expected he would be.
After a couple hours, I was on the maximum allowed dosage of pitocin, and my contractions were 2 minutes apart and getting pretty painful. I finally gave in at this point and asked for an epidural. The anesthesiologist was great, and I was surprised at how much the epi didn't hurt. I was expecting for it to be incredibly uncomfortable, but it really wasn't bad. Justin sat in front of me and observed while Nurse Ann basically hugged me so that I could bend forward into an awkward, hunched over position. I did have two contractions while the anesthesiologist did his thing, so I think that sort of distracted me from any pain that I might have otherwise felt.
Almost immediately after being given the epidural, I started to feel less pain from the contractions, which at this point were still consistently 2 minutes apart. Since I wasn't allowed to get up from my bed once the epidural was administered, I had a catheter inserted, and since she was in there anyway, the doctor decided to insert an internal monitor as well, so she could keep an eye on the intensity of my contractions.
Dr. Moore came in for one more check somewhere around 3 pm, and said that based on the internal monitor, my contractions looked great, but I hadn't made any more progress, and my baby had moved from -1 to -3.. so he was actually going back up the birth canal instead of coming down. Go figure. I was told that it was time to prep for a c-section and move from my labor and delivery room to the OR.
I was absolutely terrified. As soon as the doctor left the room, I broke down into ugly, raw sobs. Justin held me, and we cried together. I told him that I had worked so hard, and said that I wanted so badly to do this on my own; that I didn't want a c-section. I was so tired after 21 hours of labor and no sleep. I suddenly hated the pitocin, hated the contractions that led absolutely nowhere, hated the epidural because had I known I would be having surgery, I would have opted for the spinal instead. The epidural is designed to help with contractions and pushing, I was told. Women with scheduled c-sections get the spinal. This terrified me even more.
Nurse Ann and an anesthesiology nurse prepped me for surgery. My pelvic area was shaved, and a whole new dose of.. something.. was pumped into my back via the epidural. It made me feel incredibly cold, and I started to shiver to the point where my teeth were chattering. A lovely blue hairnet was placed over my disheveled hair. Justin was given a sterile ensemble to put on, too.
Within minutes, I was being wheeled through hallways in my hospital bed. Since I was laying flat on my back, all I saw were ceiling tiles and ugly florescent lights. I tried to focus on the end result, on the beautiful baby that I would soon get to hold in my arms. I knew that soon, this would all be over and I would be a mommy to a perfect little boy.
Justin was told to wait outside the operating room while everything was set up. A big blue sheet was put up, separating my upper and lower halves. The anesthesiology nurse took out my earrings, and I felt a light pressure on my lower abdomen as I was swabbed with something - alcohol or iodine, maybe - and I heard the surgical team talking to each other, as if I weren't even in the room.
I heard Dr. Kathryn say "incision" as she cut into me, and that single word made me incredibly nervous. This was it. No turning back.
Justin was finally allowed into the room after the surgery had begun. He talked me through the surgery and tried to keep me calm, but it was so hard to focus on anything other than what was going on behind the big blue sheet. I felt such incredible pressure, and at one point, I was sure I felt pain. When I said so, the doctor said that she was cutting through a layer that I might feel a little bit of. Great. I'm pretty sure I moaned and grunted through the rest of the surgery, because I felt SO much going on down there. I've heard women talk about their c-sections before, and say that they didn't feel anything, and I kept thinking that this was the most awful thing that had ever happened to me. Maybe it was because of that stupid epidural, or maybe it was all in my head; I don't know. What I do know is that I felt like I was being ripped in half.
I asked if the baby was almost here, and someone said they saw a head...
and then, suddenly, I heard the most beautiful sound in the entire world. I heard my newborn son's cry. And it was amazing. Justin and I instantly started to cry right along with him. The sheet was held down a bit so that we could see him, and the doctor said "we have a boy!" I barely remember seeing my baby for the first time; my eyes were so blurred from tears, and as soon as he was out of me, the anesthesiology nurse pumped something else into my back that made me fall asleep on the table several times.
My boys were both whisked away from me as I was stitched and stapled together. They later came and saw me in recovery, once Colin was all cleaned up and had been checked out.
So, there you have it. Recovery has been a whole different story, but after nearly 3 weeks, I am feeling much, much better. I am so blessed to be a mommy, and to have this amazing little boy in my life. I look at him every day with a sense of awe; I haven't fully wrapped my brain around the fact that he is mine, and that I grew him in my body. I honestly couldn't ask for anything better. And my husband has been fantastic throughout this whole adjustment process. He is such a great daddy, he truly is. And we are a family. :)
Bless you if you've read this whole thing. I hope I haven't scared anyone too badly!
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