It's 2 am on the dot, and I'm awake. Why? 2 reasons. Number 1, I took a 3 hour nap with my son in the afternoon, which I never do, and number 2, my son is sick and waking up at least once per hour tonight. :( He's had a fever for a couple days, which I thought might be a reaction to the flu booster he had on Thursday afternoon, and now he's congested with a runny nose. So much so that he can't breathe with a paci in his mouth, and keeps moaning and crying in his sleep. I just NoseFrida'd him (google it, if you don't have one, you need one) which at first made him SUPER angry, but then once I picked him up again he did NOT want to be put back down. Poor guy. Right now I'm waiting in the living room, with the baby monitor next to me, to see if he's going to fall asleep and stay asleep. Sigh.
On another, even more upsetting, note... my grandpa is dying. Grandpa Castle, my mom's dad, was just diagnosed with liver cancer this week. After further investigation, we've been told that it's stage 4 melanoma in the liver, which spread from a tumor on his eye that he had removed a couple years ago. They biopsied a polyp in his intestine, and found the cancer there too. When you're 79 years old and have such an advanced form of cancer, chemotherapy just isn't an option. So he's basically being made comfortable at this point. It hurts my heart to think about losing him, and that I can't go to Michigan to be with him, and my mom, and the rest of the family, but it is what it is. I talked to him on the phone today for a minute. He didn't sound like himself. He sounded... medicated. Tired. But he was still the sweet Grandpa Castle I've always known, and made sure to ask "how my little man child is doing." Such a selfless man; asking how we're doing when he's in the hospital with a terminal illness.
So, these are the things that have been on my mind. And these are the reasons why I'm up at 2 am, blogging instead of curled up in my bed, trying to get some sleep.
Although, I don't want to speak too soon, but I think Colin is sleeping soundly now. I'd better take my chances and go back to bed now. Goodnight, dear readers. If you think of it, will you say a prayer for my baby boy and my Grandpa?
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| Grandpa and Colin, a few months ago when he & Grandma came to visit |
More to come.
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